There are hundreds of Web sites that try to convince science-naïve consumers that they are in serious danger if they don't keep careful track of their "body pH balance". Anyone who has studied chemistry, physiology, or nutritional biochemistry would laugh at this junk science, but to those who lack this kind of background, it can easily seem convincing.

Most of these outfits hawk dubious "nutritional supplements", "pH-balanced waters", useless pH test kits, "water ionizers" and the like. (I last tested my salivary and urinary pH as part of the Physiology 100 course I took about 50 years ago and have seen no reason to do it since then!)

Some typical sites are pHBodyBalance.com, Pasco Canada, Kangan Water. Some (like this one, a virtual supermarket of quackery) [falsely] claim that simple pH tests can "measure your susceptibility to cancer, heart disease, osteoporosis, arthritis", etc. etc. Since U.S. FTC consumer fraud regulations prohibit claims that these and other diseases can be prevented or cured by dietary supplements, it is common practice to simply make some references to what some so-called "doctors" have written in quackery-filled books such as The pH Miracle: Balance Your Diet, Reclai Your Health, while stating (in small print) that they are not offering medical advice. Especially egregious are deceptive claims hinting that that these nostrums can prevent or cure life-threatening diseases.

For example, the following typical (and scientifically absurd) falsehood can be found at this Kangan Water site:

"It is well known in the medical community that an overly acidic body is the root of many common diseases, such as obesity, osteoporosis, diabetes, high blood-pressure and more..."

Here, in a nutshell, are a few basic facts that I believe anyone with a solid background in nutritional biochemistry or physiology would concur with:

• The idea that one must consume alkaline water to neutralize the effects of acidic foods is ridiculous; we get rid of excess acid by exhaling carbon dioxide. When this is not adequate, the kidneys adjust urinary pH accordingly.
• If you do drink alkaline water, its alkalinity is quickly removed by the highly acidic gastric fluid in the stomach.
• Uptake of water occurs mainly in the intestine, not in the stomach. But when stomach contents enter the intestine, they are neutralized and made alkaline by the pancreatic secretions — so all the water you drink eventually becomes alkaline anyway.
• The claims about the health benefits of drinking alkaline water are not supported by credible scientific evidence.
• There is nothing wrong with drinking slightly acidic waters such as rainwater. "Body pH" is a meaningless concept; different parts of the body (and even of individual cells) can have widely different pH values. The pH of drinking water has zero effect on that of the blood or of the body's cells.
• If you really want to de-acidify your stomach (at the possible cost of interfering with protein digestion), why spend hundreds of dollars for an electrolysis device when you can take calcium-magnesium pills, Alka-Seltzer or Milk of Magnesia?
• "pH-balanced water" is scientifically meaningless and nothing more than a come-on for nostrums and products of dubous value.

For much more detailed information on these topics, please see my page on "ionized" and alkaline water.